Looking Good Is Feeling Good

I am the mother of two kids, and for 15 years of marriage, I rarely spent any money on myself.  Instead, I bought clothes and toys for the kids and new items for the house.  Buying things for myself seemed selfish.  Little did I realize that this selfless act was actually hurting me because not only was I neglecting how I looked fashion-wise, I was letting myself go physically.  So, you have to be a little bit selfish and a little bit vain, if you want to stay on top of the way you look and ultimately the way you feel.

Rewarding myself throughout my weight loss journey, and even now as I maintain my weight, I feel is one of the things that helps me stay on course. How many times do you reward yourself with food?  Probably a lot.  Most people who are overweight grew up with food being used as a reward. Food can sometimes be used to fill emotional voids such as to soothe anxiety, cure loneliness or boredom, or make you feel better when you are sad.  To get away from bad habits like these, it is good to keep your focus on other things.  Not that you want to become super vain, but attention paid on how you look will help keep your mind set on the goal.

If you have not lost a lot of weight yet, maybe you are not ready to buy new clothes.  If that is the case, why not try going for a new hairstyle.  Also, a new pair of shoes or some new accessories, like jewelry, can be your best friend.  You will be surprised on how splurging on these things will make you feel pretty. When you feel pretty, or handsome or cool (or manly for the guys), you will be less likely to chow down that candy bar.  Feeling like you look good changes your whole outlook for the day just as the opposite is true.

Sometimes I think we need to be selfish in order to be the best we can be for others. Let me give an example. I feel it is a little selfish to spend time at the gym rather than time with the kids. In the long run though, it makes me a better Mom. I am more healthy and fit so I will live longer and be able to keep up with my kids now and with their kids later!  I also have less stress when I workout regularly.  Now that the kids are older I also feel I am instilling better habits in them.  I try to get them involved too!  Every Monday is DVD workout day with my son and he picks the workout.  He likes the Jillian Michael and P90X workouts. It is fun; sometimes we get a little bit silly, and it is great that he is getting some exercise at the same time.

So, set some small goals, figure out what rewards will keep you motivated, and don’t feel guilty about spending some time and money on yourself.  Trust me, it’s a very good investment.  Remember, YOU are your best friend and YOU have to take care and love yourself FIRST before you can give love to others!


Becky Pandolfo is a working Mom who has a wealth of experience with many diet and fitness programs.  Her insight and information has helped countless individuals attain their weight loss and fitness goals.  She plants her flag on a small corner of the web called  Go Slim  where newsletters flow and other insightful articles whisper on the digital winds.

Having a Healthy Self-Image

It has been a couple weeks since I posted since I was away for a much needed vacation.  We spent one week in Yellowstone National Park enjoying nature, hiking, animal watching, and just having a great time.  It was a trial to get ready to go, and then a bit of an adjustment getting back into the swing of things once we were back home.  This was true in all aspects, including our food choices.  While on vacation we ate a bit more than normal, although we ate very healthy, because we were so active with hiking and such.  Coming back home, it was tempting to continue snacking on trail mix, but I knew that would not be good sitting at my desk all day!  After a couple days, I am back to my normal routine, thankfully!

One of the things that came to my mind while out and about was the topic of self-image.  You know, I love being out and socializing, but sometimes I get to feeling insecure about myself and how I look, as I am sure that many do from time to time.  It is easy to get in the mode of comparing ourselves to others and finding ourselves coming up short in how we look, our body image, our level of success or whatever the case may be.  So, I decided to do some research and learn more about our self-image or self-esteem.

Self-image is a term that is used to describe our personal view of ourselves.  It is a mental image of our charecteristics that might include beauty, talent, personality, etc.

Where does our self image come from?  It is learned from our parents and caregivers, teachers, friends, family, and relationships.  Our self image may be real or it can be distorted.  Based on this view of ourselves, we obviously develop a positive or negative image of ourselves.  Our self image is important because it affects how we respond to life and it’s stresses.

The good news is that it is not permanently fixed!  If you find that you have a poor self image there are steps you can take to turn it around.  The first thing we must do is learn to accept and love ourselves.  It is easier when we feel loved and accepted by others, so surround yourself with people who build you up, not bring you down.

Some other tips are to take a self inventory, define personal goals and be sure they are realistic, confront thinking distortions, identify childhood labels, STOP COMPARING OURSELVES TO OTHERS, develop our strengths, give ourselves positive affirmations that are real and not just quotes from a book, remember that each one of us is unique, be sure to laugh and smile a LOT, and remember how far we have come in life.  It does not matter who you are or where you are at in life’s journey…you have your own successes, your own accomplishments, and there are things about you that make you special and awesome!

Our self-image in respect to body-image is basically the same as above, but if you have a poor body image, it takes more than just changing your body…it is about changing how we think, feel, and react to our body.  Obviously weight management and surgery can alter the body but learning to have a positive relationship with an imperfect body increases our ability to lose weight.  Again, learning to love and accept ourselves for what we are…all our strengths and weaknesses is the key to having a healthy self-image.  Challenging misleading body assumptions are important too!  Most people do not look like the women do in the magazines.  Find your own beauty and everything will make sense and fall into place.

One last thing I would like to mention regarding self-image is this….Failure does not define you!  When you make a mistake or slip up, it does not characterize you as a person or determine your self-worth.  We are all a work in progress.  We learn from our mistakes. If we are not messing up now and again, we are not growing.  So to quote one of my favorite teachers, Joyce Meyers, “We may not be where we want to be, but at least we are not where we were.”

So, on that note, keep up the good work including eating healthy, working out, getting good sleep and proper supplements.  Keep reading and together we will reach our goals!


Becky Pandolfo is a working Mom who has a wealth of experience with many diet and fitness programs.  Her insight and information has helped countless individuals attain their weight loss and fitness goals.  For more information on her and the products she recommends visit: http://www.GoSlimFL.com